What struck me the most in reading these texts was how similar and yet contrasting they were. They did all have similar themes such as growth and maturity (or lack thereof, depending on how you see them). However, growth and the maturing of a child provides a viewer, especially a parent, with a before and after view of this human. A parent in particular gets to see a child born, as in “Rites of Passage” when the mother describes how she still sees her son as similar to the way he was the “day they guided him out of [her].” At the same time, he is growing up and in him she can see already the manly characteristics that he will one day fully embody, such as the ability to kill or hurt another human. Likewise, the speaker in “Advice to my Son” is writing as if to an adolescent son. He wants to both preserve in him the youthful abandon of childhood (“live your days / as if each one may be your last”) while educating the son on what it takes to grow up (“but at the same time, plan long range”). However one views this subject, weather it’s poetically or with the scientific facts of “Betwixt and Bewildered,” the process of growing up is a tough one.

Seeing as the general similarities in the readings have already been discussed I instead would like to focus on the poem "Rites of Passage". While many of you have already commented on the transformation from boy to man and the barbaric nature of the commentary, I feel as though this poem is more about the mother's battle with the world she knows lies ahead for her son. When the mother describes her son, she views him as an innocent child and comments that he is the same boy "as the day they guided him out of me". Furthermore, while the mother understands the language they use means no true harm and is merely a part of growing up, I believe that when she sees these interactions, she sees that it truly is the last birthday for her son. From this point on, his life will be that of a man in a hectic and cutthroat world, one in which she will no longer be able to protect him like she did when he was a child.

I think these stories though portrayed as having ideas and suggestions about life are more of a road map than anyting. These stories especially in the "Lesson" show life for what it is and are not true revelations or anything new. Perhaps yes there is something learned in them that was not known before but the fact remains that the cruel world would have taught these lessons quick enough. In the lesson the fact that the children were so terribly sheltered as young people would not have lasted far into their teens. These stories show more of the inevitable in life rather than preaching towards a way to live life.

I agree that these three readings were linked in relation to their dealing with the issues of growth and maturity. In the Rites of Passage, I felt like the author was being sarcastic in refering to the children as men. It seems to me that the author was hinting that even with their immature and juvenile behavior, this is still the future. The author even discussed how the classroom looked like a "room of small bankers." The Advice to My Son seemed like a father guiding a son through life, drawing from his own experience and wisdom. It seems like a changing of the guard. Betwixt and Bewildered was the most interesting to me. It dealt with the inability of the new generation of young adults to adapt to life in the real world. It really hit home because one of the points mentioned was how a young adult is more mature taking time off from school. I thought this was intriguing cause it relates to me and my journey. The problem is when you are no longer a student your forced to take on responsibilities or you will not survive.

I think one of the most interesting things that these stories represent is the idea of children and development, yet it is all taken from an outsiders point of view. The Lesson is the only one that takes the idea life lessons from the personal point of view of the child, yet still proves the idea that the children need to live the situation to learn from it. I think an important element to notice is that all of the stories are told from grown ups who have either observered or are living in the memory of when they were children. Rites of Passage is told by the mother who is observing a bunch of young boys as they are interacting and getting to know one another. She notes how they are treating each other and is making inferences about how she thinks they are feeling and reacting to each other. Yet, it might be a little hard for a grown woman to know how young boys would play and the thoughts that were going through her head. But, it is easy to look back and make retrospective assumptions based on what she might have learned and observed growing up. Advice to My Son is about what seems like a father figure telling his son about lessons in life that he needs to know or keep in mind, yet all these ideas are something that the man has learned after his many years of growning and experience. It would be hard, especially for a young man, to take in all this advice and to fully understand its meaning. Betwixt and Bewildered is all about research that has been done by many adults on teenagers and their observations that have been drawn over the years of how they are maturing and going on with their lives. Once again, this was done from an outsiders point of view who isn't living and growing with the subjects at hand. Its east to step outside the box and seeing the figures in hard form, but to actually be the teenagers living and going on with their lives, it's hard to see and understand what their statistics mean. The Lesson is the only one that is told from someone who was living the information that they are being told. It represtents the children's mind set on what is trying to be taught to them. Yet, its very striking that the adult does a better job of teaching the children life lessons by letting them experience things for themselves. By taking the children into the toy store to see the prices of the items it makes them come to the realization of money and their unequal opportunities more realistically. As I said before though, it was hard for the children to understand the lesson they were supposed to be learning when it was coming from an adults point of view outside of their reality, until they were submerged in the lesson she was teaching and got the experience the reality themselves.

I believe the pressures of society on children and teenagers are criticized in these works. Who has the right to say at what age or in what manner a person must achieve maturity? And for that matter who has the right to define maturity by socioeconomic status and independence or any other similar measure? "In Rites of Passage", the young boys are described as young bankers and Generals who play war and have smooth skin as if they shaved recently. All of these are adult concepts and represent society's anxious attempts to push rather young boys into adulthood which is defined by career, the ability to understand complex topics such as war, and physical appearance. "Advice to My Son" also seems to be pushing a younger child by giving them information that one doesn't expect them to use at their current age but in the future. By planting this information in a child's head however, it pressures them to use it sooner than they may need to and mature, according to the standards set by society, at a more rapid pace. It also seems to be a short cheat sheet on how to succeed in the society in which they live which implies accepting society's standards and succeeding according to the expectations of others. "Betwixt and Bewildered" is a very clear example of the pressures of society in terms of maturity. Maturity was once defined by and individual's independence but is now being described by many as the ability to succeed (ie. become wealthy or famous) as fast as possible. These pressures may even lead to emotional paralysis and the use of antidepressants according to Alexandra Robbins and Abby Wilner. Finally, in "The Lesson," the teacher Miss Moore pressures the younger generation of the poor community in which she lives. While she has great intentions of inspiring these children to become more wealthy and powerful in society, and is successful in doing so, it may become an additional pressure to "grow up" before they are ready. The other works of writing would support that this pressure may actually be harmful, however in looking at this story alone, it may be beneficial to these characters as they become inspired to succeed and that success will lead to a better balance between people within their area.

I think the underlying theme of these readings is the idea of transition, mainly the transition into adulthood. I think Rights of Passage shows the initial eagerness that some have for their transition into adulthood, and how in one's youth you strive for adulthood and feel that age equals power. Advice to My Son serves as a warning to growing up too fast, it serves as a counter to Rights of Passage in a way. Betwixt and Bewildered shows how this transition into adulthood has changed over time. And The Lesson gives us a different perspective of this transition, that of the lower income family. All four of these approach the transition into adulthood from different perspectives, and all come together to give a relatively complete view of the transition.

Rites of Passage, was actually rather sad to me. It confuses and sort of infuriates me that from such a young age young boys are taught that their self worth is how strongly they can defend themselves or hurt another. "I could beat you up." "We could easily kill a two year old,". Statements made so light hearted and yet so serious is sort of what brain washes young boys, making them beileve war and the murder that coencides with war is not only ok but essential to some survival. I think that In Rites of Passage and Advice to my Sons, there are underlying messages about the military. Rites concludes with "We could easily kill a two year old, he says in his clear voice. The other men agree, they relax and get down to playing war, celebrating my son's life." Playing war as a way of celebrating life, kind of an oxymoron.
In Advice to My Son, it seems as though the advice being given is coming from someone who has experienced war, "live your days as if each one may be your last (for they go fast, and young men lose their lives in strange and unimaginable ways) but at the same time, plan long range. It seems the advice he is giving is to plan for a long life, relish and enjoy your life but be aware that the end can come at any time and you must plan for that as well.
Betwixt and Bewildered, was very interesting to me because I have a lot of friends in their mid twenties who feel as Abby Wilner put it "overwhelmed helpless and clueless, indecision and apprehension." I can also attest to the fact that many young adults do feel paralyzed and turn to antidepressents. I have a handful of friends in and already out of college that turned to medications to help them deal with the stresses of our "quarter life age crisis?"
I didnt really understand the The Lesson, and I definitely didnt really understand why Sylvia meant when she said "Aint nobody gonna beat me at nuthin.

What stuck out to me the most in Rites of Passage was the masculinity that the boys were trying to show off to each other at such a young age. Olds is giving an example of the aggresiveness that is present in such young boys. In Advice to My Son, the parent is giving what seems like simple advice to his son. However, as Betwixt and Bewildered notes, times have changed between us and our parents generations. The path to adulthood has become "not only longer, but also more circuitous, complex, expensive, and vaguely designed than ever before" (640). The economic and financial view of this can be seen in The Lesson, as Sylvia finds out the difficulties in the lives of the poor.

Each reading allowed one to see and compare children of different ages as well as different backgrounds. There were messages pertaining to maturity, poverty, eduction and everyday living. Rites of Passage allowed the reader to get in the minds of children and see what's considered important at their age level. Another story showed the transition from adolescence to young adults. I found this very interesting and was able to relate 100%. It was somewhat difficult for me to make that transition. "The Lesson" focused more on children from low income families with very little education experiencing life from the other side. I didn't really understand the lesson that Ms. Moore was teaching the kids at first, but I later felt that her lessons were being taught through experience itself.

All of these readings had the subject of maturity in common. It seems they all represented how children are expected to grow up so quickly. In the first reading, the "little men" have grown up too quickly. The second warns to slow down, but don't forget to plan for the future. The third article rang very true to our generation I think . It's easy to see how I (and many of my peers & friends) could fit into one of Barbara Schneider's three groups of kids. The last story is a bit more creative in the way it shows the narrator reacting to Miss Moore's life lessons. The reality of walking into an FAO Shwartz was a big shock to those children that come from lower income families.